Advent has been a struggle for me. I have been transitioning from a season of intense spiritual growth to a dry, crusty stand-still. Instead of having hope in the anticipation of Christ's arrival, I have been consumed with my current state of hopelessness-- in the world's state of hopelessness. This semester has been a constant battle to stay positive. I can no longer muster an ounce of hope with my tainted perspective, and God has not been delivering fresh insight into my outstretched hands. My prayer life has been drooping in the light of tired disappointment from hoping without results.
The only redeeming factor during this difficult semester has been community. God has graciously blessed me by placing me among some incredible organs from his own living body. Never have I experienced a more Christ-exemplifying community of believers than I am experiencing now.
Today at church, a few girls from the Zambia team stood up to share about their trip. Laura-Marie and Kathryn shared, in particular, about the way God humbled them in their efforts. They expected to be heroes, but many of the patients they tried to save died. What a hopeless circumstance. Yet, God gave them a peace and hope in the brokenness. They were forced to trust God because they lacked all control and ability in themselves. Kayla told me the other night that a church community is important because other believers cover our weaknesses and vice-versa. This morning was an example of that fact; I was encouraged by their testimony, and their faith infected mine like a contagion. Somehow, I am hoping vicariously through the hope of others (what a tangled web.)
Hoping is hard. Praise God for a breathing, blinking, beating body of believers.
Anne you write beautifully.
ReplyDeleteThank you for your honesty. Know that we are praying for you and that God works through his Church and his Body to draw us to himself when we don't have the strength. You are loved!
I agree. You write so beautifully, Anne. I hope you're confident in your gifts.
ReplyDeleteAnne, you can be so many things in the body. I think you'd be a good part of the digestive system. Because the idea is that you provide for the physical needs in order to make the body function best. You're a feeder.
ReplyDeleteIf Kayla's an organ, she's in the nervous system, because she's always relaying messages and networking.
Rachel would be in the skeletal system, because she's always providing support to the body.
I'm in the muscular system, because I provide movement.
Mike is in the circulatory system, because he is a relayer of nutrients and essential things. Things different from food, because they're less noticed on the onset, but absolutely vital. He's a different kind of feeder.
Kyla might be in the immune system, because she's all about removing invading viruses that come to the body.
... It's 3 am, how am I looking at an article on basic anatomy right now?
Bethany,
ReplyDeleteI love this. You are so creative and uplifting.
Bethany, that was SO great! Thank you :)
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